Me n cooking?

Yeah, I admit I'm one of those people who cannot cook. When I told my father I wanted to get married the first time his reaction was "nak kawen?masak pon tak pandai lagi. Belajar masak dulu" (u want to get married? you can't even cook. Learn to cook first - direct translation..hehe). From then on I tried to learn but still lazy to observe my mum when she's in the kitchen. Everytime she cooks I'll only take note the basic things in cooking such as put cooking oil in the hot pan first then some onions and maybe chillies, well something like that. And what comes after I couldn't careless.

Now that I'm married cooking is obligatory. Eating outside is soo much expensive nowadays eventhough the petrol is cheaper then before. When we go for grocery shopping I'm in charge because I'm the one who will do the cooking. Hubby just follow and sometimes if he feels like cooking something he'll put his ingredients in the trolly.

Everytime I have to cook I'll think hard on what to cook for the night. Asking hubby is no use because he'll answer back the same thing everytime "masak pape jer. I makan jer sume" (just cook anything. I eat anything). You see hubby is the easiest man ever when it comes to food. He'll just eat anything no matter what I cook even though it does not taste that good most of the time it would be my cooking.

I don't have any specific recipe everytime I cook it is because we don't have that many ingredients stocked up in the kitchen. Everything is limited. You see I'm still in the proces of learning after one year of marriage. So when I need to cook I'll just keep on adding stuff which I think will add something to the taste. It would always take me an hour to finish up cooking because of this. Cooking while figuring out what to put in next not to mention me tasting it everytime.

The point is, no one really needs to learn how to cook. when the time comes that you need to do it you'll know what and how to do it. Cook books just make everything complicated with the measurements an all. Just be creative in the kitchen. Let your taste buds run wild and you'll be suprise with the outcome. That's what I've learnt.

Me, Sofeah & Work...

So this is my daily routine and it will remain the same until I start work again. At 5 a.m Sofeah will wake me up because it's her feeding time and i will go back to sleep when she's done usually around 5.45am. By 6.30am hubby will wake me up for subuh prayer and I'll stay awake until hubby goes to work by this time Sofeah is awake again. And again I'll feed her until 8 a.m. after that I need to bathe her and put her clothes on. Done with this part I'll leave her for a while to hang some clothes out in the balcony. Usually whilst I'm doing this Sofeah will always be awake and sometimes she plays alone or cry a little bit because she knows I'm not around her. She hated being alone but most of my time I'll be with her. Other times I even play with her even though I know she does not understand a word I'm saying.

By me mentioning my daily routine is not to bore you people reading this it's just the fact that I'm getting use to this routine and I'm afraid of getting back to work. I spend 95 percent of my day with Sofeah and I know I'll miss her soo much. Every single day I'll learn a new thing about her and she also learns a lot as she is awake most of the time. When she is sleeping I miss her and when she's awake I want her to sleep. Funny eh.

How I wish I don't have to work but I can't let hubby feed the family by himself either. So I'm force to work to pay debts,bills and the house rent. Not that we have that many debts but at the same time we don't want it to mount either. I can't imagine the feeling leaving Sofeah at home one day. Even now if I leave Sofeah alone in another room I'll feel guilty for not being there with her and tears will trickle down my cheeks. I think about her all the time.

There are times when it is hard for her to sleep either because she does not feel well or she just force herself to stay awake. During these time I feel restless trying to get her to sleep. At one time I even cried together with her not knowing what she wants and why is it so difficult for her to sleep. I did everything from checking her diaper to giving her gripe water for colic. Nothing seems to work. True says hubby that sometimes we need a time off from her or else we might go crazy, by this he means us going to work. No one can really last taking care of a baby alone 24-7. We might loose our sanity even. That is why when a women who are in their confinement should never left alone with a baby for a long period or else they might go bonkers or the Malays call it 'meroyan' I think. this is why I salute to all housewives out there.

Despite the fact that sometimes I may be exhausted taking care of Sofeah but in the end it is all worth it. Looking at her very cute face every time made me think have I taken care of her good enough? Is she happy? or Am I a good mother?

Moving on, my preparation before going back to work again. I have to prepare mentally as well as physically. I have to get use to leaving Sofeah and not seeing her for long hours. I also have to make sure that I leave enough milk for her for the day and so I better start pumping and stock up milk in the freezer.I have to wake up extra early to feed her and start my first pumping session and thank god I have plenty of milk to feed her. My office hour ends at 4.30 pm so I don't have to go through the bad traffic on the road. Even though the office hour starts at 8.30am I still have to be there by 7.45am for free parking otherwise I'll have to pay Rm4 for parking. Usually we leave the house by 7 am.

All in all it's going to be difficult for me to leave her. I don't want to be those parents who only see their child at night and weekends only. I don't want to come home when Sofeah is already asleep and she can't recognize me anymore. I want to know my child and in the future children more. I want to know their likes and dislike. I don't want to miss out on them growing up. I just want to be a mother who cares for their children and not abandon them, but I'm afraid I might turn into parents that I don't want to be. I pray to Gad each day that I won't be just like any other parents.

Right now I just want to spend all of my time that I have left with her which is 2 weeks left. I really am gonna miss her. The cute smile, the cute faces she makes and everything about her. I love you soo much Sofeah..

Why consuming soy milk are harmful for babies?

It all started when I read my friend's blog about soy milk. Well she did write regarding what people say about soy milk and not of what I intended to write here. What caught my attention was that she mentioned there are a number of people(mostly the malay society) believed by drinking soy milk during pregnancy, you will have a baby of a fairer skin(I guess that's like what everyone wants by believing in such thing). My personal view is that I do not believe it's true. The colour of the skin is genetic really.

Moving on, there are many research done regarding soy milk and the dangers of soy milk. In the US, a vegan parent fed their newborn baby only soy milk, apple juice and a small amount of breast milk. Six weeks later the baby died because of insufficient nutrients. The parents were sent to jail.

According to research, soy milk were proven to have caused growth problem in children, infertility and breast cancer to women also in infants it has been linked to autoimmune thyroid disease.

Soy milk also increases the body's requirement for vitamin D. It absorbs the vitamin D thus leaving a small amount behind for the body. Newborns require a lot of vitamin D for it's system and a low amount of vitamin D will result to jaundice.

There are some parent out there who substitute breast milk or formula milk with soy milk for their infants because their babies are allergic to these type of milk. Studies have shown by giving them only soy milk will only do harm to infants as it has a chemical called genistein which can cause damage the intestinal growth in babies.

Pregnant women can drink soy milk but in a moderate manner as it can disrupt the endocrine to function and also the potential to cause infertility as well as promote breast cancer due to the substance that is in the soy called phytoestrogens. This amount of estrogens contained in soy milk is equivalent of at least five birth control pill per day. Premature development of girls and also the underdevelopment of males were linked to the consumption of soy milk.

Breast milk is the best milk for babies under the age of 6 months. Therefore mothers should always bare in mind that breast milk is the best milk to feed their newborns and if they can not produce breast milk only then they can opt for formula milk and avoid feeding them soy milk whether it is fresh or formula. Both are equally harmful to babies. Moreover babies who are breastfed exclusively are proven to have better functioning immune systems as well as added protection against heart disease, eczema, asma, respiratory infection and the list goes on.

My intention of writing this entry is to give an awareness to all mothers out there about the dangers of soy and also to promote breast milk at the same time. If you are able to feed your child with breast milk please do so. Allah has given women the best milk for their babies for a reason and if you love your little ones please give your child the best milk in the world~

Smile Alwayz =)

Sofeah Going bald~

Visit this blog and see the pictures of Sofeah going bald..hehe

http://sofeahsmemoir.blogspot.com/

She's Soo cute..cuter when she's bald

Ayah n Ummi love u soo much..

Smile Alwayz =)

Training bagi EBM

Alhamdulillah hari ni Sofeah minum dalam 4oz susu. Senang hati saya. Biasanya Sofeah tak suka minum susu EBM. Kali ni dia minum dengan banyak sekali. Nak kena biasakan dia dengan minum susu dari botol ni. Tinggal lagi sebulan sahaja saya akan mula bekerja semula.

Sebelum ini saya pernah bagi juga EBM tapi Sofeah muntahkan semula. Hari ni baik pulak dia minum je. Itu pun setelah saya tukar strategi. Instead of bagi susu yang dari freezer(kebiasaanya susu yang telah saya pam saya akan masukkan dalam freezer terus, bile nk minum malam sebelumnya saya akan alihkan susu dari dalam freezer dan masuk dalam fridge so the next day takde la susu tu beku) tapi kali ni susu yang telah saya pam saya musukkan dalam fridge sahaja. takde la susu tu beku. So terbukti sekarang ni Sofeah suke minum susu yang fresh sahaja.

Selepas minum ada la dia muntah jugak, ini biasa. Kalau dia minum straight from the source pon sama jugak. Dia terlebih minum tu tandanya. Saya akan teruskan usaha supaya Sofeah boleh terima EBM dengan lebih baik lagi. Nak panaskan susu EBM ni pon saya kene belajar juga untuk dapat suhu yang sesuai untuk Sofeah minum. Tak terlalu panas mahupun tak terlalu sejuk. Apabila saya dah mahir saya perlu ajar mak mertua saya pula since dia yang akan jaga Sofeah nanti.

EBM (Expressed breast milk) = susu ibu yang di pam

Smile Alwayz =)

Saat cemas~

Semalam genap sebulan umur Sofeah. Ummi dah ayah tak tahu ape kebolehan Sofeah pada umurnye. Nak dijadikan cerita, malam semalam kami menonton televisyen sampai pukul sepuluh. Sofeah tdo lena atas tilam dia yang empuk tu seperti biasa. Sebelum masuk tidur saya dan ayahnya masuk bilik dulu untuk siap-siapkan tempat tidur. Ayahnya solat sementara saya duduk depan komputer sekejap. Selepas ayahnya selesai solat, berborak la kami berdua. Tengah berborak tu dengar la sofeah merengek(biasa la dia kalau tidur memang tak pernah senyap). Saya dah ayahnya tidak pedulikan lagi dan sambung berborak.

Tiba-tiba tergerak hati saya untuk check keadaan Sofeah. Ya Allah terkejut saya apabila nampak Sofeah jatuh dari tilamnya. Bederau darah saya. Takut jugak la ape2 jadi kat dia. Kepala terhantuk ke ape. Terbaring la sofeah atas lantai, matanya terbuka luas pandang atas. Saya nampak dia macam tu terus saya jerit dan angkat dia. Saya peluk dia sambil mata berair. Perasaan saya masa tu tuhan saja yang tahu. Macam-macam saya pikir. Macam mane la die boleh jatuh. Budak umur dia dah boleh bergolek ke? nasib tak tinggi.

Masa nak tidur pon saya asyik terpikir balik kejadian itu. Budak kecik at that age kepala dia sensitif lagi. Tak boleh terhentak sangat. Saya ada baca pasal budak jatuh buai dan keadaanya agak kritikal disebabkan hentakan yang kuat pada kepalanya. Risau saya dibuatnya.

Pagi tadi pon sama juga. Saya letak dia sebentar atas tilam tu sambil saya sidai kain kat balcony. Kejap saja. saya boleh nampak dia dari cermin sliding door tu. Disebab ralit sangat buat keje tak sedar ape sofeah buat kat dalam sebab sangkakan dia tido. Bila saya toleh tengok Sofeah saya nampak kepala dia dah jatuh dari tilam badan senget atas tilam. Berlari saya masuk angkat dia. "Ya Allah, lasaknya anak dara aku ni tido" Saya pulak tak belajar dari kesilapan semalam.

Sekarang ini saya sedar bahawa saya tak boleh tinggalkan dia sorang-sorang walaupun sekejap saja. Kena mengawasi dia setiap waktu. Selepas ini tak boleh biar Sofeah tido sendiri. Kene ade orang jaga. Menyesal saya tinggalkan dia sendirian.~

~Maafkan ummi ye Sofeah~

Me being paranoid~

Is it just me or it's a common thing among first time mothers. I think I'm paranoid at least hubby things so. The thing is I worry too much of every little thing that happens to Sofeah. Am I being negative? I don't think so. I think it's just normal for a mother to worry about their child sometimes.

It all started when my daughter was diagnosed with jaundice. From then on I kept on worrying if the fever never did tone down. I could not tell the difference in the tone colour of Sofeah's skin or the colour of her eyeballs. Sometimes I just think that I'm seeing things or rather I think I'm colour blind now. There are times when I see like Sofeah's lips a little bit pale or her skin tone is a little bit dark or sometimes red. It worries me. Maybe there's just something wrong with me eyes that I'm seeing all these colour tones.

I also have this habit whenever Sofeah sleeps I will touch her or rather check on her from time to time to see whether she's breathing or not. Crazy eh~ I think so too. But I just can't help it. Maybe because everything's just new.

Like any other newborns, Sofeah have colic problems from time to time. This worries me a little bit. Sometimes you can see her bloated stomach and know that it hurts because she will cry and when she sleeps she does not sleep well, she'll make sounds and also moves a lot like she's not comfortable. Me and hubby did some research on the net and we might want to test giving gripe water to Sofeah. Since I breastfeed her, I too have to watch out what I'm eating. Otherwise Sofeah will suffer and I do not want that. I would do anything for my beloved daughter.

It's normal right? I mean for a mother to worry about their child. Especially when it's a newborn. But to worry too much is not good I guess.

So, Smile Alwayz and tawakkal saja selepas berusaha.. =)