Friday, June 5, 2009

I'm just terrible~

This morning is the second time my daughter fell off our bed. I should have known better. I should have put her in her cot before doing other thing. After the incident she cried and when she has calmed down she was very quite. She didn't want to move. She just lay down. Maybe she was terrified. The fall shocked her. What I fear most is her health. I worry she might have broke her bones from the fall or the worse, bleeding in her brains. I fear for the worst. I'm a terrible mother. A crazy woman can do a better job at being a mother. I'm just down. Not a good day today. She deserves better. I'm a bad example.

Note for my dear daughter, Nur Alya Sofeah,

No matter how loud you cry and scream as a sign of protest when I or ayah put you in your car seat or your cot we will put on a deaf ear as we know that's the safest place for you. We love you soo much dear. I'll try my best not to neglect you in the future.

Your sorry mother,

*I feel like I've failed being a good mother. I've never felt so disappointed with myself like what I'm feeling now. I'll cry just thinking about it *


mEiZ AraNda said...

as long as she is good dear...
tu paling pntg...

jgn jd down..kena ajar sakit baru sofeah tau wat is sakit tu mean....

kan lg x bagus kalau dia x rasa sakit nanti?let her learn a new things...

when she cry then u noe she's hurt..
kalau dia jatuh x rasa ape kan lagi kite risau??kan??

Mary said...

don't be too hard on urself! i noe u're feeling kinda down, i think every other mother would naturally fel the same way. but it was an accident!
and im quite sure sofea wont want to roll off the bed anymore.
cheer up ok!

love mary

Sofeah~ said...

thanks for the support. being a parent ain't easy. you tend to worry soo much for everything. makes you wonder how your mother felt when you hurt your knees for the first time eh. and yet we tend to through tantrums at her.huu~

Humaira said...

Farid *hugs* i know u feel bad and all, but u should not hit urself too much because of it. I am sure if Fea cld speak, she'd say she has the BEST mother in the whole wide world. I saw how u handled her the other day and i was filled with envy. Tibe2, the idea of marriage and having babies is not so terrifying anymore. if u and wan cld do it, m sure i could too;) see? inspirational la ko ni. Serious. Tak Caye tanye kak amrah and Khai coz i told them abt how i felt.

So yeah, dont beat urself over the matter, it's bound to happen, once in a while:) U r a wonderful mother who is trying to juggle between work and family; it's not so easy. I can barely handle my pathetic life.

take care now dearest, my hugs and kisses to Fea. She is SOOOO adorable and lovable and cute. *yeah yeah, m having an overflow of maternal instinct now* hehehe.

love u, babe!