Ok...fine i'm a freak...this is what I do evrytime I drive back to UIA or back home...heh..I like to look at or remember or stare at other peoples plate numbers...I really dun know why...I guess it's my habit, or my interest...kind of weird isn't it...soo anyway this is what i look at in the plate numbers...whether it is WLP, WLS or BCQ...and the numbers 4241, 7702, 3571...haha...i remember peoples plate numbers...that someone that i'm close to once a upon a time a go...heh...so i counted the numbers which ones occurs the most and smile at myself sometimes for the satisfaction just by observing these numbers...some of them are really close...the numbers that keeps on occuring is 77...i wonder why...hmm...owh sometimes 553 also comes up a lot...heh...I'm quite good at remembering other peoples plate numbers...(most of the cars in UIA)...creepy huh...
Ever wonder how sometimes we stumble across smthing by coincidence but to you it seems like fate...but the truth is it is just by a mere accidental situation, i think thats what you call it...haha...I always wanted answers for everything that happened to me. I always want a quick fix when something bad happens to me...why is that? and when i try to fix it, it seems to get worse than before...the real world honestly does not work the way you want it...you do not have total control of what lays ahead in the future...there is always the unexpected will come up...
Why is it that when you are in love, you dun see that other persons bad side and when you are apart you see it and you tend to say it out to them...hurting them purposely...hmm...sorry for that...that other person does the same thing back to you...you are hurt back...it suppose to bring satisfaction but instead both of us gets deeper scars than we were before...what do you say when a person says your relationship just does not make sense anymore...hmm...am I suppose to feel bad about myself?...
So what do you say when someone says that you have no interest, suddenly you are boring, suddenly you are just the bad person, your that bad past of theirs...what do you say?...I really do not know...is it the best way to move on by remembering and reminding yourselves of the bad things people say to you...to move on, on the basis of what they say...some of the things people say are true about me...hmm...am I not loveable...I think so...Honestly, I am just afraid of being lonely...
Is it time to change...change to what?...to be a better person?...am I not a better person right now?...who am I...I have not find myself... maybe this is the time...I have to prove to a friend that I can live whitout a guy...I guess it's been some time that I'm all alone...I need to be independant from now on...
Why do people that don't want you anymore says that they still wants to care for you...they shouldn't....it makes it harder to move on...it is like their giving hope but actually they are not...just saying that so that you feel better..really...hate this feeling that I have...why do I have it...why am I still hoping when I know there is no hope anymore...
- SMILE ALWAYZ =) -
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